2012 December 17 (Monday) : The Proposal

I continue to feel light-headed today after my exercises, for I feel the Lord continue to tell me “Do not shrink back, I have something awesome prepared for you today.”  My princess has in mind to take me back to the Gem shop today.  She has given me her ring finger size, I have met Jess from the Gem Shop and I continue to feel I am in a dream.  The Lord continues to deal with Princess Kim at the breakfast table, for there is still fear in her heart and the Lord’s words from Sunday echo back, “If GOD is for me, who can be against me?” Over and over.  Indeed, when I think of the One who walks on water, who raises people from the dead, who walks away from the very ones who are trying to kill Him WHILE they try to kill Him and who raised Himself from the dead EVEN THOUGH THEY KILLED HIM…… who indeed? 

I explain this to my Princess, I keep asking her to look into my eyes as I tell her this, that she now has family enfolding her, princes to protect her, that I KNOW that God has called me from Africa for this purpose. An answer to the question at last.

This confirmation is for the Prince too, for he partly believes that the Proposal is today, and he feels light headed, the feeling that he may accept what he sees for he is expecting to wake up.  Keith, one who GAVE UP on marriage is now on the Lord’s path TO marriage and it is the Lord Himself who took him from Africa and placed him at a Princess’ side and how can he refuse? For he knows that the Lord has placed in his heart a yearning, an aching, FOR marriage.  Wow.  We go to the Gem Shop.  Kim tells me that she has a meeting with Marianne, so she will leave me there and return, she also speaks of writing in her journal.  I am at the delightful point of accepting whatever my princess has to say, any decision she makes, for I KNOW she hears the voice of the King of Kings Himself and I KNOW at last I can trust her and definitely Him. Wow.  I speak again with Princess Jess and she speaks of engagement ring prices.  I feel my flesh shrink back, but my heart, my spirit, my soul urge me on, telling me the truth that there is no price on EARTH that I would not pay to remain at the side of my princess. 

A vision of a Keith who remains in Africa comes to me, a Keith who refused the hand of his princess.  A broken, empty, shell of a man who contemplates suicide, who hates his own guts, a depressed, lonely, poor man, a man who shrunk back, who denied his own destiny, who said “no.”

I CANNOT be that Keith, I will be that Keith who looked into his Princess’ eyes and said YES, a thousand times yes, with all my heart, YES!  The road may be rocky, but a princess will be at my side.  There may be a thousand things to do first, but a princess will be at my side.  I may receive scorn, mocking, disbelief from others, but a princess WILL BE AT MY SIDE.  The ONE THING I KNOW since the day of the start of my adolescence is that I have yearned for a princess.  I have searched for her, got lost looking for her, yearned for her, ached for her, cried for her, got angry at the King of Kings Himself even because I have missed her so and finally gave up the thought of ever meeting her, but now HERE SHE IS, AT LAST!

There is not a snowflake’s chance in hell that I can ever leave her side now.

I look into Princess Jess’ eyes and we agree on a price.  A simple number.  Paper changes hands and I am now a Billionaire.  A Prince with a Princess at my side.  A King in the midst of commoners, a billionaire in the midst of the poor, a fiancée among an ocean of singles. Princess Jess tells me the day when she expects the ring sizing to be complete and I feel myself again in heaven.  “You are now an engaged man!” she smiles sweetly. “Not yet, but soon,” I hear my heart gently whisper.  There does need to be a proposal!  How can I describe this feeling? Heaven. Perfect.  The only thing left to be done are the streets of gold.  I feel a confidence that any second now, I will see Gold Paved Streets, for the rest of Heaven is already in place, in front of my very eyes.

I had in mind that today was the day that I would ask my princess where exactly her favorite place on earth is, she would take me there and I would propose.  Not yet Keith.  The ring is needed!  Wait for princess Jess.  The Lord has His timing.  We are in heaven, after all.

Princess Kim takes me once again to Culvers, I eat once more at a princess’ side, a Culvers whatever burger.  I feel in my heart that whatever this princess chooses to eat, I can ask for the same.  If she loves it, I KNOW I will.  I can never get tired of this feeling.  39 years, but here you are at last, princess.  Prince Charles, I KNOW you know what I am talking about.  No wonder Princess Laurie told me the family hardly ever hears from you since you got married.  No wonder indeed.

My princess takes me shopping again.  “The Perfect Romance, by Princess Kimberly” exists now, in the heart of my princess.  We purchase a voice recorder, I test it. It works perfectly.  I give my Princess a title.  She is free to keep it and free to erase it and replace it with hers. The rest is in her heart.  I yearn to hear EVERYTHING princess.  Take your time.  When YOU say it is done, it is done.  If you say not yet, it will not be finished yet.  I am now your Lord’s appointed anti-crapinator. Any more crap in your life and I take care of it.  It is my honor, my privilege.  As crappy as your past was, that is how good your future will be.  I am an anti-jerk, sent from Jesus Christ Himself and it is my pleasure to give you pleasure princess. One day at a time, as Jesus Christ Himself leads.  Starting with “The Perfect Romance, by Princess Kimberly.”

Uploading photos on Facebook, due to popular demand!     We go to Princess Kim’s high school Christmas Concert.  Perfect.  Perfect singing, perfect jazz, perfection.  Simple.  I love the sound of princess’ singing! I love the poetry of princess’ playing! Memories of choirs from Hogwarts come flooding.  That was a fiction, however, this is heaven for real.  My princess takes me to the Happy Wok for supper.  Perfect.  A Chinese man! I ask if he speaks Mandarin or Cantonese.  “Both!” is the answer.  This is a man who knows he is privileged to work in the land of the free and the home of the brave.  He asks me why I am interested. I tell him my passion for languages.  I halting demonstrate the only Mandarin that comes to mind, 你好！你会说语吗？ “Ní hao! Ní Hui shuo yu ma?”  He smiles genuinely.  “Not bad!” he says.  I am glad his English is better than my Mandarin.  A delightful Chinese meal with a princess.  Fortune cookies!  My princess and I both read them out to each other, but they are soon forgotten, for we both know our fortunes.  “We have come into the kingdom for such a time as this.”  It is enough.

So the proposal is not yet, but it will come.  My princess will say yes, for her father has already given his consent, she has already given hers and she already has my heart. Wow.